The week leading up to sermon delivery is a funny thing. Well, funny in hindsight, mostly painful as you live through it. Sometimes you have a series that is already mapped out and you can work within the fence of that safely. Many times these are grounded in a series from another church that went before. These work as modern Bible commentaries for the busy and stressed pastors of our age. But then there are the “one-off” sermons. These are the random three day weekends where church attendance typically, but not always, dips.
This weekend is Labor Day.
That means churches across the country will have their student or associate pastors speak. It’s good experience for them. These are the opportunities for the back ups and the rarely ups to go any direction they wish. Oh the glorious freedom and trust given to these utility batters of the faith!
Here is where I find myself. Speaking on Sunday and toiling every day leading up to it. This is a good stress, a welcomed one. This is what I was made to do and I relish every agonized moment. I feel that I write a handful of sermons leading up to the one I actually deliver. This week’s message starts on doubt, then shifts to pacifism, then a message on God’s thoughts on the environment, before landing on mental health.
So I am speaking on mental health (as of the Thursday in which I am writing this. There are always those wild card change of directions that come the weekend of. Yay Holy Spirit!) Who would have ever saw that coming?
These weeks are fun, grueling, and soul enriching (“enriching” is a kind word for battering, humiliating, and exhausting ). Many times I have the urge to speak totally out of right field (or left depending on your politics) and reach for some under presented topic such as the trinity, Holy Spirit, or gun control, but I understand the real world consequences of these.
So instead I comb the pages of thoughts, ramblings, and possible directions given to me in the shower, at red lights, and in the night’s silence. Throughout the week, I pray and look for real life examples to better direct and refine those 30 minutes granted to me twice on Sunday. All the while, wishing it was socially acceptable to simply open the Bible and read; discussing openly and wildly (Church Gone Wild!).
Sermon prep is how I grow spiritually. It is a beautifully imperfect process of doubt and faith, and I find myself in the middle of it. The “I” is slowly beaten into holy submission, or at least that is the end goal.
Here’s to Sunday and it’s hidden battles.
Matt simon blog 